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The Relation SHIFT Webcast - (Dec 15, 2022)

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  • Amanda Cosgrove Paffath
  • Amy Schiveley
  • Amy Schiveley
  • Anne Floreau
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    Lesson 4 of 3
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    COACHING CASE STUDY: Needs, Authenticity, Integrity and Boundaries (30 mins) Copy

    Q -My mom told me she is planning on leaving my dad after 39yrs. She has not told him yet.  And She kind of indirectly announced that she would like to stay with me when she does. She offered some money to help fix up one of our extra rooms where she could stay and suggested that she use the space as a base of operations. (not sure what that means…)   

    After hearing her plan, I found myself offering for her to stay with me and my family…  But I may have been manipulated without really thinking about it.

    I’m honestly also not sure if I did it out of obligation or to have the extra help with the housework, kids, etc.  Am I doing this from a place of guilt? I am being selfish? How will this affect our relationship?  I have also realized that I was very indirect when I first mentioned this to my husband. “I offered it as a kind of “hypothetical” situation – but I had already offered it to her. 

    I’m also concerned about how this will affect my father. I have heard that she has been going to leave him since middle school and I always tend to be a mediator and get involved way too much in their relationship issues. Part of me doesn’t also does not even believe that she will even follow through. She has a tendency not to follow through with things. It’s a bit of a mess. Your perspective would be really helpful.